Sardar Banta Singh went to the emergency room with the tip of his index finger blown off.
"How did this happen?" the doctor asked.
"Well I was trying to commit suicide," Banta Singh replied.
The doctor asked, "Trying to commit suicide by shooting your finger?"
"No, silly! First I put the gun on my head and I thought my face would look horrible, then I put it in my mouth and I thought I just paid Rs. 1,000 to get my teeth straightened. So then I put the gun in my ear and I thought this is going to make a loud noise, so I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the trigger."
A Sardar was walking along, when he looked up to observe a bird flying overhead. Suddenly, the bird drops a load when it was directly over him.
The Sardar says, "It is good that cows don't fly"
A Sardar is in a bar and his cellular phone rings, so he picks it up and says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"
How many Sardars does it take to pull off a kidnapping? Six.
One to kidnap the victim and five to write the ransom note.
Why are Sardar secret agents the best in the world?
Because even under torture they can't remember what they have been assigned to.
Did you hear about the Sardar who asked his friends to give him all of their burnt out light bulbs?
He just bought a camera and wanted to set up a Darkroom.
Banta Singh was painting his living room one hot day.
"Why", his friend Santa Singh asked him, "are you wearing two jackets?".
"Because," said Banta Singh, "The directions on the can says 'put on two coats'."
Sardar was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile. Then the foreman asked the Sardar why he kept painting less each day,
he replied "I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can"
Why does a Sardar keep empty beer bottles in his fridge?
They're there for those who don't drink.
Why do Sardars have see-through lunch box lids?
So that when they're on the train they can tell if they're going to work or coming home.
Sardar,a Japanese, and a British were lost in the desert. They were driving around in a Jeep when it broke down, because they had nothing else they decided to each take a piece of the Jeep as they continued their journey. The Japanese took the radiator, the British took the seat, and the Sardar took the door.
After a while of walking the British asked the Japanese "I'm confused, why did you bring the radiator?"
The Japanese responded, "If I get thirsty, can drink the fluid."
Next the Sardar asked the British "Why did you bring the seat?"
So the British said "If I get tired,I am not going to sit on the sand. I can sit on this comfortable seat."
Finally the Japanese asked the Sardar why he had chosen the door.
The Sardar quickly responded to this question, "Well, when it gets hot all I have to do is roll down the window."
Why couldn't the Sardar write the number "eleven"?
He didn't know which "one" came first...